jay’s staff picks!
Jay (they/them) has been a bookseller since 2023. When not at Lost City, Jay also works in the sex education field and, as a former bodyworker, teaches consent-focused massage classes to students and couples. They are currently incorporating more fiction into their palette, but often gravitate towards books on sexuality, race, mental health and trauma. Jay loves spending time by the water, enjoying good food + drinks, dancing, and hanging out with their cats.
SISSY: A COMING-OF-GENDER STORY by Jacob Tobia
I had the privilege to collaborate with this sparkly human in my early to mid-twenties when we were trying to disrupt some typical non-profit power structures. I always appreciated Jacob’s sharp, sarcastic wit, insistence upon speaking their truth and being seen in their fullness, and commitment to challenging harmful societal norms. Reading Sissy was like being in the room with them; Jacob’s voice shines through beautifully and their story of contending with gender continues to affirm how I navigate my own non-binary transness. P.S. Check out Jacob’s website and acting career for more great queer content!
DIVERGENT MIND by Jenara Nerenberg
I found myself describing this book to a fellow astrology lover as only knowing my sun sign and then finding out about my whole chart. While this book and its research are based on, and geared towards cis women, it has been vital in understanding and embracing my own neuro-divergence as a trans masc human trying to understand the coping strategies I’ve unknowingly put in place my whole life based on how I was conditioned/raised. P.S. The author at least acknowledges trans ppl and the applicability for us.
SISTER OUTSIDER: ESSAYS & SPEECHES by Audre Lorde
A collection of Lorde’s work that has so deeply informed both academia and movements. Current and future authors may change language and add additional insights, but Lorde’s words will forever remain pivotal in launching discussions around race, class, age, gender, and sexuality. “Poetry is Not a Luxury,” “Uses of the Erotic: The Erotic as Power,” and “The Master's Tools Will Never Dismantle the Master’s House” will be ones I return to over and over.
COME AS YOU ARE by Emily Nagoski
How we experience sex and pleasure is a combination of so many factors including history, context, attachment, mental health, physical health, etc. and this book dives into the current neuroscience. While it is geared towards cis women and is also a necessary read for anyone who has sex with cis women, the knowledge is also important, relevant, and translatable to trans men and women, and non-binary folks, and the author acknowledges that.
ACE: WHAT ASEXUALITY REVEALS ABOUT DESIRE, SOCIETY, AND THE MEANING OF SEX by Angela Chen
A thought-provoking read whether you are allosexual or asexual or on a spectrum (whether you experience sexual attraction or not/sometimes). For many folks, there are sooo many myths to bust about asexuality, which this book does, but it also goes deeply into so many things we are indoctrinated with about sexuality, romance, partnership, etc. and can be really helpful in both understanding ourselves and our lovers.
MY GRANDMOTHER’S HANDS: RACIALIZED TRAUMA AND THE PATHWAY TO MENDING OUR HEARTS AND BODIES by Resmaa Menakem
There are so many books out there on trauma, self-help and improvement and somatics (somatic meaning body-based); as a person who is in this field and am familiar with many, I’d say….if you read one, make it this one. While SO many books fail to acknowledge the ways we are all existing in different forms of racialized trauma which inform how our bodies and minds react – this book does a deep dive. If a book, a school, a system, etc. is not race-informed, there is simply no way for it to be trauma-informed. Practice this book in community, with discussions with loved ones. Take it slow.